Rodney is an IT Implementation Consultant in the Motor City and working within the Automotive Industry. He contributed to OTB from November 2004 until retiring in July 2017, hosting some 1200 OTB Caption Contests.
Reuters headline: “Bush Fakes Turkey Pardon”
CNN Headline: “Bush Pardons Fake Turkey”
AP Headline: “Bush Saves Life of Turkey While Soldiers Continue to Die In Iraq”
Agence France-Presse Headline: “Bush Remains Defiant as He Refuses to Bring Troops Home to Witness Turkey Pardon”
UPI Headline: “Senator Reid Claims President Misled America Concerning Time of Turkey Pardon Ceremony”
Al Jazeera headline: “Crusader Armies Feast Yet Again on Sacred Muslim Soil”
NY Times Headline: “Under Bush Americans Are Ever More Obese Even as Hunger Grows”
Washington Post Headline: “Bush Steps Up Attacks On Anti-War Critics With Turkey Pardon”
Daily Mirror Headline: “Turkeys Pardoned by Bush Named Rove, Libby”
Pajamas Media Post Title: “Turkey? What? Bush League? Who? Why Am I Here?”
“Psst, Mr. President, continue to act perfectly normal, sir. The Secret Service has determined that any man that happy about having his hand on a turkey’s ass must be considered a threat. Please exit to your right when they take him down.”
President Bush takes some time out of his busy schedule to view a turkey said to have the personage of Helen Thomas — “Uh, President Bush, its the other end.”
Why, the golden eggs can easily pay for next year’s invasion of Iran!
President Bush thanks Harriet Miers for her loyal service, and apologizes for that whole silly Supreme Court appointment thing.
Greetings Mr. Reid. Can we discuss the ‘Loser’ comment as Mr. Alito heads to the Supreme Court?
Karl, you don’t need to go through all this trouble to get a pardon from me. Just take off the turkey suit and we’ll face this like men.
President Bush: “Damn James, these plastic turkeys just keep getting more lifelike every year.”
President Bush: “In a change to tradition, I’m renaming this turkey to ‘WMD Lie’ and we’re going to kill it right now.”
Alice Johnson is President of the National Turkey Federation? Howard Dean stepped down and I missed it?
Bush: “What should I do with Iran?”
Turkey: Gobble, gobble, gobble.
Bush: “And Syria?”
Turkey: Gobble, gobble, gobble.
Bush: “And North Korea?”
Turkey: Gobble, gobble, gobble.
Bush: “Man, that’s one smart turkey.”
Bush: “Well, I think you should be in the EU too.”
President Bush meets the new mascot of the Democrats who seek to change their image before then next elections.
Reuters headline: “Bush Fakes Turkey Pardon”
CNN Headline: “Bush Pardons Fake Turkey”
AP Headline: “Bush Saves Life of Turkey While Soldiers Continue to Die In Iraq”
Agence France-Presse Headline: “Bush Remains Defiant as He Refuses to Bring Troops Home to Witness Turkey Pardon”
UPI Headline: “Senator Reid Claims President Misled America Concerning Time of Turkey Pardon Ceremony”
Al Jazeera headline: “Crusader Armies Feast Yet Again on Sacred Muslim Soil”
NY Times Headline: “Under Bush Americans Are Ever More Obese Even as Hunger Grows”
Washington Post Headline: “Bush Steps Up Attacks On Anti-War Critics With Turkey Pardon”
Daily Mirror Headline: “Turkeys Pardoned by Bush Named Rove, Libby”
Pajamas Media Post Title: “Turkey? What? Bush League? Who? Why Am I Here?”
* That’s a pretty young Turkey… we could call it a Goblet.
* Ummm… watch your step, Mr. President., he just left a ple of “Gobbledygook” under the table.
* no…No…NO ….I said *pluck* the Turkey!!!!
“Yes, Mr. President, this is the actual ‘Murtha Cut & Run Bill’ that the House just defeated 403-3, why do you ask?”
BUSH: “Because there is no way in Hell I am pardoning that particular turkey!”
“Psst, Mr. President, continue to act perfectly normal, sir. The Secret Service has determined that any man that happy about having his hand on a turkey’s ass must be considered a threat. Please exit to your right when they take him down.”
“Nice doggie.”
“You know, back in my Houston partying days, I woke up next to one of these in fishnet stockings.”
“….And if you rub its left wing it says…Bush lied, Bush lied, Bush lied,…..”
Meanwhile, outside at a protest Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton demanded to know why Bush only pardons white turkeys.
Look, you’re sittin’ on the manger. What the hell did ya do with the baby Jesus?
Further signs of weakening of the west, as Bush pardons a turkey, and Blair chickens out on the Al Jazeera bombing.
“Psst, Mr. President, remember Helen Thomas is in the BACK of the room.”
Bush:How would you like to head up FEMA?
Turkey: Gobble Gobble
Bush:Good Enough for me.
President Bush takes some time out of his busy schedule to view a turkey said to have the personage of Helen Thomas — “Uh, President Bush, its the other end.”
President Bush examines the latest idea to come from the Democrat opposition.
My dear little “Scooter”
This year there’ll be no shooter
Ya’ll see how good ol’ turkeys
Protect their gizzard-pooter.
* It’s Cindy Sheehan in a turkey suit!
* I understand Turkey is a dish best smoked cold
* Mate, this bird wouldn’t VOOM if you put four million volts through it!! (Obligitory Python Reference, sorry)
* The one survivor of Mr. Carlson’s station promotion goes to Washington
* Is it real? It looks like a fake, but a damned lifelike fa….. oh. Ewww. Yeah, it’s real.
Watch closely, Mr. President … when I pull out it says “AFLAC” ! !
The 2006 Budget report…
“Hey Pardner, my Pardoning list is getting longer and longer.”
Well I’ll be, I didn’t realize just how much Bob Byrd looked like a turkey!
Stung by criticism that the Iraq war damaged America’s relations with Turkey, President Bush takes decisive action.
President – “So Turkey, you’re pardoned. What are you gonna do for Thanksgiving?”
Turkey – “I’m going to Disneyland!”