Outside the Beltway

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Caption Contest

James Joyner
41

Comments

I know one is still running and I haven’t yet announced the results of the one before that (soon, Grasshopper) but this one was too good to resist.

OTB Caption ContestTM:


AP photo via Drudge Report
Write your caption in the comments below.

Update: Mark the Pundit (via Allah) has an amusing variant of the photo from the same event.

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41 responses to “Caption Contest”

  1. Bob Hawkins Avatar
    Bob Hawkins

    “Yearghhhhhhh!”

  2. Joel (No Pundit Intended) Avatar
    Joel (No Pundit Intended)

    Sorry, no caption from me. I just wish he would get his finger off of that trigger, while he’s looking away from whatever his weapon is covering.

  3. Elvis Avatar
    Elvis

    “Tell the Supreme Court that I’m ready for the 2004 fight.”

  4. Brian J. Avatar
    Brian J.

    “Chaaaaaarge (the retirement costs of my generation so that the bill comes due only after we’re all dead and no longer paying taxes)!”

  5. pennywit Avatar
    pennywit

    “We have switched Rock ‘n’ Roll Hero John Kerry’s electric guitar with a large gun. Let’s see if he notices the difference.”

  6. Walter Avatar
    Walter

    Peasants? I love the peasants. Pull!

  7. marcus Avatar
    marcus

    Democratic Presidential Nominee John Kerry yells at a handler to, “Pull the damn string and make the birdie fly” during a photo session in bubbaville, AL. Moments later a visibly upset Kerry asked the handler, “How on earth do you expect me to get the gun vote, when we can’t even pull the string?” then procedded to wing them.

  8. Professor Kaos Avatar
    Professor Kaos

    “I dont miss! That son of a bitch secret service agent made me miss!”

  9. Martin Avatar
    Martin

    “.. And as soon as the boat reached the riverbank, I charged this way into the jungle. I, you know, served in Vietnam. And that was before I starting denouncing these actions as atrocities.”

  10. paladin Avatar
    paladin

    Davey, Daaaaavy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier! (Probably only old Boomers will get this.)

  11. McGehee Avatar
    McGehee

    “Hurry up and take the picture before this evil weapon decides to just up and blow somebody away! Besides, these dungarees you insisted I wear are chafing me unmercifully!”

  12. La Femme Crickita Avatar
    La Femme Crickita

    This was exactly the position I was in when I got my first Purple Heart, you know, the one where I fired and wasn’t looking and the schrapnel nicked my bicep? I got that Purple Heart in Viet Nam. My men were surprised that none hit me in the face…had that happened, I would have put myself in for Congressional Medal of Honor. “Pull!”

    You know, it is all about nuance: The way the pigeons fly on being released, whether or not I have any shells, and most of all, if I actually hit anything. I almost shot myself in the foot in VietNam. That was when I got my second Purple Heart. Did you know I was a veteran of that war?

    “Oh Ruuuuubeeeeeeeeee….don’t take your love to town!”

  13. dick Avatar
    dick

    Hold it like this? Owww fuck that barrel is hot!!

  14. Jerry Avatar
    Jerry

    OK, Release that damn Elephant!

  15. AmericanFarmer Avatar
    AmericanFarmer

    The naive villagers did not realize the magnitude of the mistake they had made when they put fire power in the hands of the Frankenstein creature.

  16. commodore Avatar
    commodore

    Awww, leave Davy Crockett out of this. He was a true American Hero, and Stood for something…and I knew Davy Crockett and believe me, Kerry is no Davy Crockett. Kerry is a crock.

  17. Jim Avatar
    Jim

    In remembrence of Kerry last sking trip:

    “I never fire blanks”

  18. Cassandra Avatar
    Cassandra

    Once again, Senator John Kerry demonstrates that he is incapable of straight shooting.

  19. Cassandra Avatar
    Cassandra

    “I never miss!”

    “That %$@! Secret Service Agent moved the f***ing target!”

  20. Cassandra Avatar
    Cassandra

    Wounded in the leg by ricocheted buckshot from his own shotgun, Senator John Kerry wonders how many Purple Hearts he can put himself in for…

  21. Dr. harden Stuhl Avatar
    Dr. harden Stuhl

    Huh?
    Hold the heel of the shotgun just under the edge of your armpit with the barrel pointed down range…
    Huh?
    Hold the heel of the shotgun just under the edge of your armpit with the barrel pointed down range…
    Huh?
    Look down the barrel…and pull the trigger to see if it is loaded….
    Okay….
    Geez…what a moron…

  22. La Femme Crickita Avatar
    La Femme Crickita

    After firing the practice round, the Senator asked for a ‘live’ target, you know, like they had in Viet Nam. And wait til he tells Tur RAY za that he fired BOTH barrels! She always said that he was ‘half cocked.’

  23. La Femme Crickita Avatar
    La Femme Crickita

    One for the Gipper!

    He shoots, he scores!

    Uh, yeah, I think it is very important that I see my ‘gun’ as an extension.

  24. Pile On® Avatar
    Pile On®

    Here, let me show you how we celebrate a wedding out on the cape.

    “Woh–who–ey! Who–ey! Who–ey! Woh–who–ey! Who–ey!

  25. Pile On® Avatar
    Pile On®

    From my cold dead fingers. FROM MY COLD DEAD FINGERS!!!

    Heh hehehe, do you think I made a connection with the knuckle dragging gun rack crowd?

  26. La Femme Crickita Avatar
    La Femme Crickita

    Pile On, I think you gave the gun crowd something to
    ‘shoot’ at….*running away laughing madly*

  27. Rodney Dill Avatar
    Rodney Dill

    “This is how I’ll finally get someone to accept the VP position with me on the ticket.”

  28. Hermoine Avatar
    Hermoine

    “My wife says I don’t look like Herman Munster!”

  29. Chortle Avatar
    Chortle

    “On OTB, I am damned if I do and damned if I don’t.”

  30. Doug of tfid Avatar
    Doug of tfid

    While trying to convince the gullable that he is not a gun-grabber, Kerry suddenly started to bray like a donkey.

    Hey, he’s a Democrat.

  31. Rodney Dill Avatar
    Rodney Dill

    “Michael Moore? can’t live with him, can’t shoot him. Damn!”

  32. Rodney Dill Avatar
    Rodney Dill

    “Whaddya mean, Dubya’s gun is bigger?”

  33. Cassandra Avatar
    Cassandra

    The Presidential candidate shows the press the kind of support US troops can expect from a Kerry administration:

    “Just look at my voting record on Defense spending. Unlike George Bush, I know state-of-the-art weaponry when I see it. After all, I served in Viet Nam.”

  34. spd rdr Avatar
    spd rdr

    “I hit it! I hit it! Okay, Teresa, throw me another doggie treat!”

  35. La Femme Crickita Avatar
    La Femme Crickita

    How’s THIS for dealing with erectile dysfunction?
    Pull!

  36. Cassandra Avatar
    Cassandra

    Oh Cricket…how could you???

    (but I’m glad you did…)

  37. spd rdr Avatar
    spd rdr

    “I said, ‘Was that your dog?’”

  38. Rodney Dill Avatar
    Rodney Dill

    “Yea, Yea, I hit the barn! Now run down there quick and paint a bullseye around the bullet hole.”

  39. Rodney Dill Avatar
    Rodney Dill

    “Ready, Fire, Aim. Not so hard, just like Politics.”

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