Looking a Gift Horse in the Mouth
If the shoe doesn't fit, wear it.
Over at Democracy Docket, Marc Elias asks, “Who will be the first to take off their shoes?“
When Joseph Stalin took the stage, applause wasn’t just standard. It meant your freedom.
As the crowd thundered with cheers, no one dared to break first. Not after two minutes. Not after four. Not after six. As Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn wrote in “The Gulag Archipelago,” “It was becoming insufferably silly even to those who adored Stalin.”
Finally, after 11 minutes, one man — the director of a paper factory — broke the spell. And with that one act of independence, he sealed his fate. The director was arrested that evening.
On his interrogation document, an important lesson was inked into the pages: “Don’t ever be the first to stop applauding!”
Now, Donald Trump’s men are learning the same lesson — the humiliating way. Although this time, the question is different: “Who will be the first to take off their shoes?”
Across Washington, D.C., a new fashion trend has taken hold of those in Trump’s circle: embarrassingly oversized clown shoes.
More specifically, a pair of $145 Florsheim oxfords. Trump is apparently obsessed with the shoes, and it’s getting weird. According to the Wall Street Journal, the president has taken to handing them out to Cabinet members, advisors and White House VIPs. He even makes it a game: guessing people’s shoe size, placing an order and then signing the box.
Forget policy and matters of government. At Cabinet meetings, Trump jumps in to ask, “Did you get the shoes?” As one female staffer noted, “All the boys have them.”
But this isn’t the type of gift horse you can safely look in the mouth. Another female White House staffer joked, “It’s hysterical because everybody’s afraid not to wear them.” Like Stalin, Trump is paying attention to see who stops clapping first.
Trump’s shoe test borders on humiliation ritual. They appear much too big on most of the recipients, and with their pants hemmed to match the president’s absurdly short length, it’s comical. One might assume that Trump purchases the incorrect sizes on purpose.
While the report, linked at memeorandum today, was the first I’d heard of this, the story has been circulating for a few days. It was apparently broken by WSJ’s Alex Leary (“Trump Is Obsessed With These $145 Shoes—and Won’t Let Anyone Leave Without a Pair“):
The hottest and most exclusive MAGA status symbol is a pair of leather oxfords.
Prefer a wingtip, loafer or monk strap? Black or brown?
President Trump’s got you.
Trump has been gifting footwear to agency heads, lawmakers, White House advisers and VIPs. “Did you get the shoes?” he asks at cabinet meetings. Some people have laced up in the Oval Office. During a lunch meeting in January, Trump suddenly pivoted to his “incredible” new shoes and gave Tucker Carlson a pair of brown wingtips.
“All the boys have them,” said a female White House official. Another joked, “It’s hysterical because everybody’s afraid not to wear them.” The shoe-salesman-in-chief is paying attention.
Trump has fallen in love with Florsheim, the American brand that’s been pairing comfort and style for more than a century. They’re also affordable: many cost $145.
The president has taken to guessing people’s shoe size in front of them. He asks an aide to put in an order and, a week later, a brown Florsheim box arrives at the White House. Trump sometimes signs the box or attaches a note of gratitude, according to people familiar with the ritual.
The 79-year-old billionaire, known for expensive Brioni suits, long red ties and a penchant for aesthetics, late last year began searching for something that would feel better after a day on the job and settled on Florsheim. Trump liked them so much he started dispensing them. He pays for the shoes, the White House said.
Vice President JD Vance and Secretary of State Marco Rubio have some. So do Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, Trump’s communications director Steven Cheung, deputy chief of staff James Blair and speechwriter Ross Worthington. Fox News personality Sean Hannity and Sen. Lindsey Graham each have a pair.
Recipients have taken to wearing their Florsheims around Trump, some apparently begrudgingly. One cabinet secretary has grumbled that he had to shelve his Louis Vuittons, according to people who heard the complaint.
Officially the White House wouldn’t confirm Trump’s choice of Florsheim. One recipient said Trump had a stack of them in an office. A box read “Scott”—for Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent.
[…]
Rubio and Vance received their Florsheims after a December meeting in the Oval Office.
Deep in conversation, Trump peered over the Resolute Desk at their feet, Vance recalled during an event later that day celebrating Kennedy Center honoree Sylvester Stallone. “Marco, JD, you guys have s—y shoes,” Trump declared before retrieving a catalog.
Esquire‘s Jonathan Evans, among others, has ridiculed Rubio over a photo that appears to show him wearing the shoes (which Evans adjudges to be the Lexington cap toe oxford) in a way-too-big size. The Bulwark‘s Cathy Young and Foreign Policy deputy editor James Palmer join Elias in speculating that this is a humiliation ritual. (Young also makes a Soviet analogy, albeit to Nikita Krushchev rather than Stalin.)
lt is, to say the least, unusual.
If the foo shits…
@Gregory Lawrence Brown: Perfect!