Too Good To Check: Bacon Will Make You Live Longer
Now here’s a scientific study we can all get behind:
Science has enriched the lives of bacon-lovers everywhere. A study conducted by researchers at ETH Zurich has concluded that the high levels of Vitamin B3 (known as niacin) in this meat could help you live longer.
To test this, Energy Metabolism Professor Michael Ristow fed roundworms a dose of niacin, discovering that they lived one-tenth longer than those who went without. The vitamin is also rich in the likes of Marmite, paprika, peanuts and sun-dried tomatoes. This is surprisingly contrary to what scientiests believed, because the standard assumption has been that niacin promotes the formation of “free radicals,” causing faster ageing.
An antioxidant-rich diet has been contradicted by Ristow’s findings, which shows that niacin “tricks the body into believing that it is exercising,” perfect for any particularly lazy individual.
Which pretty much defines the United States, no?
It’s science!
My doctor has me taking supplemental Niacin because it’s one of the best ways of increasing HDL (“good” cholesterol) levels. After doing some more research, I found that it also decreases your LDL (“bad” cholesterol) levels and triglycerides as well. It’s basically one of the better things you can take for your cardio health.
Everything’s better with bacon!
In doing some research, I find that beef also has high levels of niacin. So that means bacon wrapped tenderloins would be even better for you, right? Hell, I’m going to live forever!
Niacin without nitrates is probably even better.
…. plus, it’s gluten free, right?
Not to mention nothing that aggravates a peanut allergy.
@al-Ameda:
The chemist in me sadly nods his head, yes, bacon is gluten free.
(As I’m sure al knows, the science seems pretty solid that gluten is fine, even good, for most of us, and is only really damaging to those with a specific and rate condition. Those few of course have many, many, diet options as the
worldUS goes gluten mad.)Bacon is proof God loves Gentiles, too.
Blinded by science
@rodney dill:
Got ya covered, and I hope you don’t mind that they are certified to ANSI Z87.1-2003 (High Impact) And CSA Z94.3 Socialism!
@john personna:
I posted that for laughs because up here in Northern CA where I live, worrying about Gluten is practically a way of life.
I’ll have that on lettuce, tomato, toasted bread, or egg, cheese and on a biscuit.