One would think that a post that begins,

George Will once wrote, “Nowadays no diplomatic farce is complete without a cameo appearance by Jesse Jackson.” Truer words have never been spoken.

would send a message to all but the least intellectually endowed among us that I am, indeed, not Jesse Jackson. Nonetheless, it has now drawn five letters to my alter ego, Rev. Jackson, beseeching me for help on various problems. The latest by a California high school teacher, no less.

Let me reiterate:

• I am not Britney Spears.
• I am not “Dear Prudie.”
• I am not Rev. Jesse Jackson.
• I am not even the Sultan of Brunei. That would be Steven Taylor.

Update: Mark Hasty is not Lisa. Nor did he let the dogs out.