Newt Campaign Slogan Open Thread
Gingrich 2012: He will always love America. Unless it gets cancer.
Now that it’s a done deal that Newt Gingrich is running for President, the question arises: what will his campaign slogans be? Well, in a time of new media and crowdsourcing, it seems silly for Newt to go the old-fashioned route of having professionals craft them. I say we do the heavy lifting for him! It’s the least we can do, right?
So consider this an open thread for developing slogans for Newt Gingrich’s campaign.
I’ll start:
Ah, yes, that cancer quip will strike a nerve or two.
How about: “Newt ’12: Have you seen how pitiful the other GOP candidates are?”
Speaking of which, Obama has to be the luckiest politician on earth. Even Clinton didn’t have this piss poor a GOP primary field with which to deal.
“Gingrich 2012: He’ll keep the wife this time. At least for the first term.”
Newt 2012 Because RINOS approve!
“Gingrich 2012: He’ll always stand by America. Until a younger, prettier country catches his eye.”
“Gingrich 2012: Married to America, 4th times a charm.”
“Gingrich 2012: Solutions for Real America, the rest of you are S.O.L.”
I believe the best one I heard today was “Newt Gingrich for America. Unless it gets cancer.”
Newt for the New T Party
No, we can’t: Government shutdown, this time for good.
NEWT ’12
‘Cause America Needs an Old White Guy in Charge
Gingrich 2012: Take my wife. Please!
“Gingrich 2012: He’s a Catholic now! (Except for the anti-torture part.)”
Why look for a new slogan when so many golden oldies can be recycled?
“Gingrich…. Now, more than ever”
“Grits and Bits in 2012”
“It’s twilight in my America”
“Read My Lips: No new ideas.”
“I did not have sex (some of) those women.”
“I was for congressional pork before I was against it”
“Gingrich 2012: He’s a Catholic now! (Except for the anti-torture part.)”
And the masturbation part (i.e., this very campaign)
Apologies to Alex. I somehow missed that he had said a variant of the one I mentioned.
Gingrich 2012… Reptiles Rock!
I’d rather war game his response to the inevitable debate question (if any non-sycophant is allowed to ask questions in a GOP primary debate): “You famously called the first Latina Supreme Court nominee a racist. You questioned Obama’s loyalty to American because his father was born in Kenya. Do you regret this and, if not, do you expect the 70 million or so folks who probably take issue with this sort of thing to vote for you?
Seriously; without his substantial Latino support, McCain loses Texas and Arizona and gets destroyed in Nevada, Florida, Colorado, etc in 2008. Somewhat ought to ask Gingrich about his problem here before writing glowing pieces about his political rebirth.
Note to anjin-san:
Newts are not reptiles
From wikipedia: (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Newt)
A newt is an amphibian of the Salamandridae family, although not all aquatic salamanders are considered newts. Newts are classified in the subfamily Pleurodelinae of the family Salamandridae, and are found in North America, Europe and Asia. Newts metamorphose through three distinct developmental life stages: aquatic larva, terrestrial juvenile (called an eft[1]), and adult. Adult newts have lizard-like bodies and may be either fully aquatic, living permanently in the water, or semi-aquatic, living terrestrially but returning to the water each year to breed.
Newts differfrom reptiles in that they are slimey.
“I Got Better…”
Gingrich 2012 – I know, but look at the competition!
Gingrich: he’ll shoot a giraffe for you!
Newt 2012: I came to God so the Tea Party would come to me
Newt 2012: Faithful, as always, to my ideals
Newt 2012: Always a Gingrich, Never a Grinch
Newt 2012: For a Contract with America as Binding as My Marriages
Newt 2012: Because America needs God & Gingrich
Newt 2012: Mistakes happen!
Newt 2012: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry”
Gingrich 2012: Offering Newt, Knowledge & Know-How
I’d say go with the one that doubles as a wedding invite (and triples as notice of filing for divorce?):
Newly
Engaged (Sorry Callista)
Wedding/Inauguration on January 20th
Two-thousand and thirteen
Gingrich: Common sense conservatism.
Gingrich: Why the Hell Not?
Given his background as a professor of history, his slogan should reflect the march of time.
Thus, “AMERICA, Newt, Newtier, Newtered”
Newt in 2012. Trump is not the only one with weird hair.
Newt 2012: You’ve had a Jaguar, now go for a Chevrolet.
Newt Gingrich: Bringing America together, one party at a time.
Newt: Rock Me!
Gingrich, for the rich.
You’ve seen me in action — now ignore all that and vote for me anyway.
GINGRICH 2012: I’ll Screw America Because I Love My Mistress.
Gingrich: Because I’m even slimier than newts.
(Sung to the tune of the original Transformers cartoon)
Newt Gingrich, Palin in disguise!
I have to say, one of the best Newt Gingrich descriptions came in a Washington Post Style invitational; it was a comparison between Bill Clinton and Newt and the entry was “The Pillsbury Dough Boy and the Pillsbury Dough Boy with Fangs”…sooooo How about
Newt 2012: The Pillsbury Dough Boy…with fangs!
And here’s the t-shirt….
http://www.cafepress.com/buckstees.381670442
Newtie and the Blowhards Reunion Tour!
Vote Newt Gingrich because Rich Goon, Slimy Git, Stinky Cheat, Gin Soakedslime, Donald Chump and Scary Plain all sounded a bit more ridiculous.
I’m old, I’m fat, and somehow I was still able to make the choice to be unfaithful to her…But America, I’ll never choose to be unfaithful to you…
Gingrich 2012: Loves America So Much He Dumped 3 Wives For It
Corpulent Sweaty Philandering Gasbags Unite!
Newt Gingrich in 2012
“oh like you’ve never cheated on your wife while harshly criticizing others for doing the same”
Gingrich 2012: When You Want To Exchange Bold and Classy for Old and Gassy
New Ideas, New Wives, Fat Chance, Newt 12