12 responses to “Headline You Really Don’t Want To Read Of The Day”

1. 

   michael reynolds

   July 14, 2013 at 6:21 pm

   Damnit, I just got over checking every shower for Norman Bates. Now it’s toilet snakes?
2. 

   John Burgess

   July 14, 2013 at 6:58 pm

   After I moved into my housing on the grounds of the US Consulate in Dhahran, Saudi Arabia, my predecessor informed me that one evening, as he was quietly sitting on the can reading a newspaper, a rat poked its head up between his legs. That facility was never used during my two years in the house.

   I informed my successor before he moved in.
3. 

   al-Ameda

   July 14, 2013 at 7:26 pm

   Doug, are you trying to turn OTB into a Local News type of operation?

   LOL
4. 

   Dazedandconfused

   July 14, 2013 at 8:56 pm

   “Doctor says your’re gonna die!”
5. 

   Tillman

   July 14, 2013 at 9:35 pm

   If I don’t want to read it (and I certain as hell did not), why did you put it up here with such an alluring title?
6. 

   Stormy Dragon

   July 14, 2013 at 11:20 pm

   I’ve had it with these motherf***ing snakes in this motherf***ing porcelain!
7. 

   Stormy Dragon

   July 14, 2013 at 11:23 pm

   BTW, I loved one of the comments at the original article:

   If only the most sensitive part of the penis had some sort of natural, god-given sheath to provide some measure of protection against such occurrences.
8. 

   matt

   July 15, 2013 at 2:26 am

   @John Burgess: Stuff like that happens in big cities. The sewer system is actually mostly dry till you flush outside of the water intentionally stuck in the ptrap.

   So other then swimming through the p-trap it’s all walking for the rat.
9. 

   OzarkHillbilly

   July 15, 2013 at 5:22 am

   @Tillman:

   If I don’t want to read it (and I certain as hell did not), why did you put it up here with such an alluring title?

   Wait a minute, he told you you didn’t want to read it, but you read it anyway. If he told you “You don’t want to cut off your hand.” would you cut off your hand?
10. 

    Franklin

    July 15, 2013 at 8:29 am

    So the lesson here is to stand up when you pee?
11. 

    rudderpedals

    July 15, 2013 at 8:32 am

    July 12 (Nofit, IL) – Insta-Mohel ™ grand opening delayed due to technical considerations.
12. 

    Tillman

    July 15, 2013 at 9:03 am

    @OzarkHillbilly: ….he’d have to phrase it alluringly, like, “Don’t you want to know what it’s like going through life with only one hand?” Something better than that.